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PARENTAL DISCIPLINE AND EMOTIONAL ADJUSTMENT OF SECONDARY SCHOOL STUDENTS IN IBESIKPO LOCAL GOVERNMENT AREA, AKWA IBOM STATE NIGERIA
1.1 Background to the study
Discipline is one of those familiar words that carry different meanings. To many people discipline simply implies the setting of firm rules and limits and administering punishments for breaking those rules. The word discipline is based on Latin word “Disciplina” which means management, rule, education, practice, teaching and trained condition. Therefore, discipline entails control, regulation, and self-restraint.
Disksha(2019) views discipline as orderly conduct of an individual which is gained through training in self-control and habits of obedient to socially approved standards of right conduct. In this regard, discipline is administered in every sphere of life.
Discipline refers to set of rules and regulations, rewards and punishment administered in order to teach self control, increase desirable behaviour and decrease undesirable behaviour (Stanford children’s health, 2019). Discipline is to make an individual to follow a laid down code of conduct. The ultimate goal of discipline is to foster sound judgment, positive moral development and positive social and emotional adjustment. The rule we followed in all of our upbringing is discipline (John Piper, 2019).
From discipline we have parental discipline which implies stated rules and regulations by parents to stipulate and serve as guide to the behaviour of their children.
Parental discipline in Ibesikpo Local Government is relatively less. For instance, I met a pregnant girl about 17years under her parent care, and I started wondering how far she would go if she was not brought up by her very Christian parents. In addition to that, I met also a young lady who is so arrogant, pompous, and envious of other who performed better than her academically emotionally etc. Since she is the only child of her parents, and as such she was really pampered and showered with so much love and care that most times her wrongs were overlooked. Her mother was a really a victim to this because she was unable to reprimand her when there was need for it. The father on the other hand, though was not stern and strict he tried his best but the mother hardly cooperate with him to discipline their child. This made the child to conclude that her father dislikes her and so she prioritizes her mother over her father. In brief, her mother’s attitude which influenced her bounced back at her (mother) when she realized that it would have been better for her to corporately joined with her husband in correcting their child when she was young. Presently, this lady is out of control. Through the brief explanation it could be understood that, children with no or less parental discipline have no reference to parents neither of other people. They perform both good and bad activities anytime, anywhere without regard and respect. They are considered as nuisance in the society. However, their behavior at home determines their conduct outside home, because a person is defined by his family.
Through my observations parents with over strict discipline ends up increasing distorted relationship between them and their children. Children of this nature are compelled and influenced to obey rules at home and school. They do it unwillingly and are subjected to eye service. They are forced to put or fit in on tight shoes no matter how painful it is, and so their happiness or liberty is not guaranteed by their parents.
Parental discipline influences the behaviour of the child in the society. It either brings up good and emotional adjusted child or breeds bad behaviour in the child. Research has found out that positive parental discipline – authoritative parent determines well emotional adjusted children while negative – indulgent, uninvolved parent bring up maladjusted children.
Adjustment refers to an individual general adaptation to his environment and the demands of life such as the way he relates to other people that is interpersonal behaviour. The society is dynamic and change is the only constant thing, so the individual’s ability to review his attitude and behaviour is an essential ingredient of adjustment. Adjustment is served as a state of equilibrium, a form of balance in person’s own internal system. The equilibrium concept leads to definition of adjustment is a process rather than a satisfaction of need, thereby reducing tension particularly when usual ways of meeting the need are blocked (Eliot, 2005). A sequence of adjustment begins when a need is felt and ends when it is satisfied. Hungry individuals for instance are stimulated by their psychological state to seek food. Therefore, they reduce the stimulating condition that impelled them to activity, and there by adjust to this particular need.
Emotional adjustment is personal because it involves individual cognitive process. It is maintenance of emotional equilibrium. It involves emotional control and coping in face identity crises.
Emotional adjustment is considered as prime motivator of human behaviour, for example, emotional adjustment leads to normal behaviour whereas mal-adjustment leads to abnormal behaviour. Emotional adjustment is otherwise referred to emotional intelligence. According to Dr. Peter salvery (1990).Emotional intelligence is the ability to know, feel, judge emotions in cooperation of a person’s cognitive behaving in accepting or proper way with ultimate realization of happiness in him and others.
In addition to that, most intelligent people in many instances fail to control and manage their emotions, while average intelligent people properly and effectively harmoniously manage their emotions. Emotional adjustment leads to normal development normal development leads to healthy life.